I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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