What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize