I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I just gift wrapped bread.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
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