I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Randomize
