We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
not ubering you a puppy
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
