whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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