Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Randomize
