dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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