he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
