Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
