Its about making memories worth repressing
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
