I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
