i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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