We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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