Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
