Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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