Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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