something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
