He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Someone signed my nipple.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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