Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
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He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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