Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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