I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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