we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
