man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize
