Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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