I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
