I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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