You just made me feel so damn special
I don't think brook has ever known best
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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