it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
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