i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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