This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
i came on her dog
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Randomize
