Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
