I hate all girls vehemently.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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