i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
vagina is talking i cant
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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