Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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