I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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