youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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