if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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