Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
