How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
