i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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