I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.