sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
