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Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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