This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
