Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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