Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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