porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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