It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
