I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
