I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
