So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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